Getting out of bed at this time of year is a real struggle. No matter how many times you press that snooze button, again and again, you. Just. Can’t. Get. Up!! You would rather hibernate in your bed until spring than venture out into the darkness on a perilous journey through the blistering winds, in the cold and the rain, to get to work.
Well, at least the Christmas holidays are coming up very soon, but not soon enough. You’re anxiously counting down the days where you can finally eat, drink, be merry and sleeeeeep!!!
But until then you’re tired, and when you’re tired you do stupid things. Very stupid things. In fact, I don’t even think it’s because the days are darker. For some reason these days, I don’t know – maybe I’m getting ‘old’, but I just feel so tired. Like, ridiculously tired – stupidly tired. I do the most stupidest things, ever.
“I must be overtired’, Buttercup managed. ‘The excitement and all.’ ‘Rest then’, her mother cautioned. ‘Terrible things can happen when you’re overtired. I was overtired the night your father proposed.” ― William Goldman, The Princess Bride
As I’m yearning for my bed right at this minute, I’m writing this post to highlight how dangerous (to your dignity) tiredness can be when you’re doing the most mundane and automatic tasks.
So in no particular order, here’s a selection of stupid things people have done as a result of fatigue. Ok, maybe this was mainly myself. Have you ever:
1. Used your Oyster card as a key fob to enter your work building?
2. Used your mobile phone as an Oyster card at a tube station?
3. Slurred your words on the phone so badly that the receptionist asked how you were feeling? You said fine, and then out of politeness asked them the same question. They replied that they were better than you…
4. Used a fork as a spoon to eat your cereal?
5. Sent the wrong cover letter for a job application?
6. Forgotten to send a CV with your cover letter?
7. Attempted to put a tub of butter into the cutlery draw?
8. Used hair lotion as body cream?
9. Used hair lotion as face cream?
10. Poured lemon juice into your cup of hot chocolate powder?
11. Attempted to pour cold water into your powdered porridge instead of the hot water that is needed to make it?
12. Searched high and low for your glasses only to find that they are already on your face?
13. Opened the dishwasher to put butter in it?
14. Called someone you know very well by a completely different name and prayed to God that they didn’t hear you?
15. Had a conversation with the wrong person? This is something that can easily happen on something like WhatsApp for instance, especially if they share the same name, i.e. Michelle.
16. Attempted to use nail varnish remover as a facial toner?
17. Made a whole bowl of couscous for breakfast when in actual fact you wanted porridge?
18. Ran into a large mirror as soon as you woke up because you heard a knock at the door, but you woke up in such a panic that you thought the mirror was another door?
19. Desecrated the English language with sentences like: “She took too slow”?
20. Spent half an hour looking for clothes you were already wearing?
21. Woken up suddenly on a train and realised to your horror that you were halfway through a conversation you were having with yourself out loud? As the only people around you were sitting right in front of you, you decided to pretend to be on your phone and tried your very best to carry on with the conversation that you didn’t particularly remember the details of…
Remember, tiredness kills, or it at least makes you do stupid things. Rest well, or if you can’t do that then you can purchase a walking sleeping bag like my friend below. Feel free to share your tired/stupid stories. Sharing is caring and all that malarkey. Peace.